Uncertainty?

Staying optimistic is difficult when the river offers no clue as to where it is taking you. What path will i choose for myself? Is it even a choice that is mine to make?


Is your clutch effecting me in ways that i fail to realize? Will i one day regret ever making this leap into your arms. i could stop now but the way you change my perspective of the world i live in intrigues me so.



As for you, you seem so lovely and im starting to really like you, I just dont know what to do, again the path i am meant to choose is a mystery to me.

Fate?

Theres a place i like to go, its a place where i can just sit and think, watching the water slowly pass me by, on its own journey, it doesnt know i watch it, it will never know how intently i watch it take the leaves away on their own little journey, not letting them have any control over their destination. I sometimes see myself as a leaf, being thrown down a course chosen by something other than myself, never truly in control, not knowing where i am going, just hoping my destination is somewhere nice. I used to wish for someone that i could sit with at this place, and watch the leaves pass me by, watch the water control their destinies, sitting in comfortable silence, with no need to talk. Is she the one who can be that person?

We arent given too much time

Life is just amazing right now, nothing really matters and we can all live how we will, society puts pressure on us to be successful but really we can do as we please, the world is ours and anything is possible. We arent given long here, so we have to make the most of the time we do have. Right now, I have so many options as to what i could do after school and after university, the world is mine, nothing is holding me back. Everything is lovely...



I just wish all the death would stop getting me down.

At least it lets me know how deeply priveleged i am to have the chance to live a good and plentiful life.

Blogging and Friends

Blogging is so interesting. You have lots of teenagers writing about how they truly feel about their friends, then you have their friends following them, so the person who wrote it in the first place is fairly sure that the person they are writing about is going to read what has been written about them. Which means that everyone who writes, lets people follow them and uses their real name , wants their friends to read it, so the people who are really nasty towards their 'friends' through their blogs are just being little cowardly fucks who want to tell their friends how they truly feel, but in an indirect manner, which just really fucks me off.

Stop beating around the bush. Try to tell people how you really feel in person, keep your blogs anonymous or stop hurting your friends by intentionally allowing them to read what you have written about them. You should respect and appreciate your friends more than anything, they deserve some honesty, they are the ones who will keep you sane and get you through your teen years, and maybe even your life.

You also have the lovely people who write really nice things about their friends, they are the best :).

Blogs that say "today i went to dinner" really fuck me off too, this should be a place where you can just ramble on about your feelings and thoughts, or try to be deeply intellectual and alter peoples perceptions of the world :P...Get a fucking Twitter if you want to tell me what you ate for breakfast...

Nothing on Shakespeare

I needed a place to come to write, to get out all of my thoughts and my feelings, the ones that dont find their way out in the day. Here i can be as anonymous as i like, say what i like, be who i like, this can be my haven. I will never use my name or anyone elses names, everything will remain a mystery to anyone who finds this. I apologize in advance if the writing is shocking. I dont exactly intend this to be a great work of literature.

Right now, life is great, i dont have much reason to write, my only troubles are in love, and none of those troubles really mean much as i am just as happy being single as i am when i am in a relationship. Chasing people around doesnt really appeal to me, i just keep my eye on a few and see what happens, but right now i am content with how things are going.

To my friends, I love you all so much, I dont know what i would be without you lot, i try my best to express to you how much you all mean to me, but sometimes i probably dont do a very good job. I always know there will be someone that i can talk to when i need to talk to someone

Two of you have been with me for close to 5 years now and i couldnt have asked for better people to grow up with, you two will forever be with me, wherever life takes me, to think i might have to leave you two in the next few years to follow my dreams brings tears to my eyes. I doubt i will ever meet two people as genuine as you again during my life.

I love you all.

Okay, so i lied a little before...as with every good tale there is a girl...and the troubles surrounding her do mean a fair amount to me...she is beautiful, funny, interesting, just the right amount of weird, and just good fun :). Only problem is im not sure how long she would stick around with me, maybe thats a good thing, having just come out of a long relationship maybe i dont need someone who is too committed, but then again maybe another long relationship would be good for me...

Time will tell if the decisions i will make in the next year will be good for me, maybe i should just stick it out, as usual, and see what happens.


Anyway, that was a long first post, ill keep them shorter in future.

See ya ;)